god, he called for rain

[shooteverything]

[ the shatterdome is too loud, smells of seawater and sweat, and half the time k-science won't even let him stay in the lab, one of the few quiet places in the entire base. but it's home, in some ways, because heine has lived here for more than half of his life.

and that reason is also the reason why he's doing the introductions for the new pilot arriving today. she's not new new, but new to this shatterdome. heine has read her file.

now he's in his fatigues, arms crossed as he waits on the tarmac for her to arrive. there's a lot to go through before her jaeger even arrives. ]

Comments

[shooteverything]

[ he bares his teeth at her greeting, looking (probably not for the first time) like the kind of hellhound his jaeger is named after. the indifferent languidness that usually characterizes his body language is gone, replaced by a tight fury that has the area cleared out of all but the most necessary workers. this isn't the first time heine's had a very visible, public confrontation. ]

What the fuck. [ for all his sharp edges, he doesn't actually swear too often; all the same, the word tears its way out between his teeth. ]

What the hell—you almost got us both killed. You tell me you want to be the best there is? You'll get nowhere but the bottom of the goddamn ocean freezing up like that.

[ he lets the tense silence stand for a moment, teeth gritted as he glares at her. ]

And you won't be there alone. I can take care of myself, but if that happens again and whoever you're fighting with isn't ready—

[ he tightens his grip on his helmet again, trying to put the sheer frustration and anger (and, quietly, disappointment and old regret) he's feeling into words. after another second he just turns and starts to walk away. ]

[antisheep]

[She deserves every bit of his anger, but that doesn't stop her from scrunching up tighter, as if she makes herself smaller it might spare her from some of his rage. Naoto turned her face away from him, trying not to flinch when her words are thrown back at her. They seem hollow now, as they've always been. He's right of course. The only reason they're both alive right now is because he was with her. The only reason she had managed to get this far was because of other people. If it had been someone else...

The sound of Rammsteiner stalking off jolts her out of her stagnant state, and she stumbles to her feet to follow him. She's terrible at killing, and even more terrible at apologies but she will at least try. She owes him that much, and she will feel guilty.]

Wait.

[It might not be the best idea to follow after him when he's so obviously angry, but so far he has been rather reasonable and kind to her.]

I'm sorry. [More hollow, meaningless words.] I'm really sorry.

[She faltered, her eyes darting anywhere but to the person she was talking to.]

[shooteverything]

[ when he hears her voice, he stops in his tracks for a beat, and then keeps walking. he doesn't want to talk to her. heine doesn't want to say that he expected better, but—he can admit to himself later that he did, because her cool self-confidence and burning desire to prove herself reminded him of something in himself.

for now, though, he doesn't want to hear it. heine half-turns at her apology and fails to make eye contact. ]

I don't care if you're sorry.

[ apologies don't mean anything to him (especially if he ends up giving them to someone long gone). ]

I don't want you in a Jaeger again unless you're prepared to actually do something.

[antisheep]

[It's one thing to not accept her apology. Naoto understands. In their line of work, words are pretty meaningless. It's results and technique and skill that should speak for themselves, and right now she might be better off silent. 'Sorry' doesn't make up for almost getting them killed. It wouldn't help her with the possibility of killing someone else if she gets partnered with another pilot.

Her eyes are downcast until he mentioned barring her from a Jaeger until she could prove herself, her eyes widening as she looked back up, still following him.]

For the next one I'll be prepared.

[There's no hesitancy in that. Once she managed to get the jumbled mess that was her thought processes and emotions in check again, she would figure out what had gone wrong and correct it. She would go it alone if she had to prove it.]

[shooteverything]

Stop following me. [ he snaps, moving to set aside his helmet as he heads back to his station. ]

And quit saying things if you're not going to follow up on them.

[ something like, 'i'll believe it when i see it.' after that, heine's more than happy to just walk away and go off to stew elsewhere. his arm hurts, but he has no plans to go to the infirmary. it'll be weeks before he sees her again for the next deployment if he has his way. ]

[antisheep]

I want your word then I will get another chance.

[Because Heine might not realize or might not acknowledge it, but his word had weight here. If he said he wanted her grounded she was sure she would be.

Even if he lashed out at her, she wasn't going to leave until she got that confirmation. Proving herself was important, and while she wouldn't admit it, she wanted to prove herself to this man more than most.]

[shooteverything]

[ he pauses again for a second, expression tight and pained in a way that looks unfamiliar on his face. he's turned away, in any case, and when he does go to face her his face is stoic again. ]

My 'word' doesn't matter. If you're good enough, you'll be back out there.

[antisheep]

[It's not a promise nor is it very comforting, but Naoto will take it. She inclined her head, eyes still downcast. She clenched her hand into a fist, gathering her resolve.

It wasn't just Rammsteiner who had a say in this, after all. After that terrible performance, she might be lucky just being able to do simulations.]

I will be.




[OOC: Did you want to skip to a few days after where she's still proving herself or would you rather go to where she's back in the jaeger?]