drear | don't rely on the strength of my image, hey

[Kouta licked first just to be contrary, but followed instructions obediently enough afterwards. After all, he had said he would make sure Noiz got off and it was always easier when the other party was so vocal.

He bit into the plump cheek of his ass before scraping his teeth with far more pressure, alternating between teeth and tongue. He started getting into a rhythm, enjoying pulling away a bit to make Noiz follow him before dipping back in closer.]

[ The repeated biting and licking, and the additional sucking makes Noiz suspect that he'll end up with an ass covered in hickeys later, but that's not a turn off. He breathes out softly, eyes shutting as he tries to take it in.

It feels a little better, a little more real. Noiz huffs softly and pushes his hips back again. He's starting to get hard just from the rush of it. It's... weird, having Kouta listen to him and respond to him. Biting his lower lip thoughtlessly, he mumbles, wanting more. ]

Finger me.

[It was definitely weird to find Noiz's tiny mumbling request cute, but considering Noiz had been so surly and defensive early, he would take it as a vast improvement.

Normally, he would tease, but he didn't want to discourage Noiz from being vocal, so he pulled away for a moment, pressing kisses up along his spine.]

Where's the lube?

Don't know. [ He doesn't use it much, because Kouta is right, he usually hooks up with people who don't care about him or if he feels good. And without lube he at least feels something.

Noiz braces himself more firmly against the arm of the couch to frown at him. ]

You can just do it with spit.

[That causes Kouta to stop, and he propped himself up on his elbows, brows furrowed disapprovingly.]

No way. It'll hurt you.

[Just what kind of people had Noiz been with before that this was okay?

Kouta started to stand, going to head towards his jacket where he'd stashed the necessities.]

[ Noiz is at a loss for words for once. Turning further, he watches Kouta get up and then return with the lube. ]

...it won't hurt me.

[ He stays where he is, bending his knees slightly and feeling both on guard and taken very off guard. Right now he still doesn't understand what Kouta wants. Watching him warily, Noiz curls his toes again in the fabric of the couch, squeezing them in until he feels a dull ache. ]

[Even if what Noiz was saying was the truth, the lost and surprised expression on his face was enough to solidify that Kouta had made the right choice. He would have liked to go back to meet all of the people that had thought it was a good idea to fuck Noiz without lube like it was a given and punch them in the gut so hard they wouldn't be able to get it up again.

But he couldn't, so instead he'd settle for the next best thing, which was helping Noiz raise his standards and not be afraid to ask for better. He settled back on the couch, lubing up his fingers and pressing one in.]

It might not hurt, but did it feel good to you?

[ Noiz turns so his back is completely braced against the arm of the couch and moves his feet to give Kouta room. Going along with him now is still strange, grating. He doesn't know why Kouta is being nice. He can't be feeling anything from this. ]

Sometimes. Because I could actually feel it when they fucked me.

[ Right now he can feel Kouta's finger, too, but mostly because it's big and the first thing to really enter him. Noiz squirms on his hand, bumping against his knuckles, taking it deeper and squeezing around it. ]

I don't... know why you're doing this.

Are you not that sensitive?

[People had different abilities to feel, after all, though Kouta normally dealt with people who seemed so sensitive they could come just by the wind blowing a certain way. It would be a bit trickier dealing with the other side of the spectrum, but he would do his best.

He slid in another finger since Noiz didn't seem to be lying about not feeling it much, scissoring them apart inside him to try to gauge what exactly he could feel. When he answered, it was mostly absent-mindedly.]

Because I want to. You deserve to feel good too, Noiz.

[ Noiz doesn't reply at first. The second finger is a bit more stimulating. Noiz exhales slowly, knees bending more. ]

I can't feel anything. Except for my tongue. Ever since I've been born, I haven't been normal.

[ Kouta just doesn't get it. Noiz doesn't deserve any of this. ]

Nothing?

[Well, so much for thinking it would just be difficult to stimulate Noiz. Even with him two fingers deep and scissoring, it really did seem like he wasn't feeling any of it. But more importantly, Kouta felt the need to kiss him just then, moving up to do so.]

There's no such thing as normal. And it seems like to me you can still feel what's important.

[ Noiz's brow knits at that sudden kiss. ]

But I can't. I don't feel things like a normal person does, so I don't know what it's like.

[ It's his emotions that are unsettling him, but the only way Noiz knows to react is to act out. He gives Kouta a sour look and starts to back up, squirming away from his fingers until he's got nowhere else to go with the couch arm blocking his way. ]

Isn't that not normal?

[It seemed like understanding was going to be hard won in spurts and that there was going to be push back no matter what Kouta said, so he let Noiz put physical distance between them, watching him carefully.]

It just means I'm going to have to work harder.

[It was said calmly, more an assessment than a judgment, Kouta sitting back as he looked at Noiz curiously.]

Does it bother you that you don't feel that much physically?

[ The lack of response takes the wind out of Noiz's sails. He sinks back down against the upholstery, knees knocking together and chin pulled down as he looks up steadily at Kouta.

He isn't lying. Noiz can tell that much. After another pause he answers, words coming slowly. ]

Yeah. Of course it does. [ Frowning, Noiz pulls his legs closer to himself. ] It means I'm not normal. I'm messed up. And it means I hurt people because I don't know what it's like.

[It might seem laughable that someone as tiny as Noiz could hurt someone, but if he hadn't been able to understand or feel pain, it was possible he had gone too far in the past. Kouta reached out to rub a soothing hand against the top of Noiz's knee.]

We should establish boundaries and safe words then, so you don't hurt me on accident.

[He paused to let that suggestion sink in before adding:]

You worrying about other people sounds pretty normal and not at all messed up to me.

[ Noiz just blinks at Kouta for a moment. Coming up with plans and boundaries ahead of time... he's only come up with plans to fuck in various, more exciting ways before.

He won't touch on being normal for now. He only cares now because he's been bad before. ]

Then what do you want me to do?

[ He likes the hand on his leg. Slowly, he extends it, using his foot to hook around Kouta's back and encourage him closer and on top of him again. ]

[Kouta followed the motion up to Noiz's mouth, speaking in-between soft kisses.]

Green means keep what you're doing. Yellow means slow down. Red means stop. Easy enough, right?

[He paused, letting that last kiss linger.]

And kiss me.

[ Moving his hands from behind himself, Noiz slowly reaches for Kouta. He's right, this is simple enough. And so far it has felt good. Physically, the stimulation is less than he's used to, but... he feels stable. He feels like Kouta's actually listening to him.

Arms loosely around Kouta's neck, Noiz lifts his head and kisses him. He takes his time at that moment, exploring the shape of him with his tongue. When he's satisfied, Noiz pulls him closer with a short tug. ]

I'm ready.

[Even though Noiz had been a bit reluctant in the beginning, it really was astonishing to Kouta that just by being patient and explaining his reasoning honestly was enough to make Noiz seem more receptive in just this short amount of time. It made him a little pissed to think about all the other people that Noiz had been with, who hadn't been willing to take just this short amount of time.

But instead of lingering on that, he opened his mouth to Noiz's kisses, soft noises of encouragement spilling out.

He didn't need too much goading to figure that Noiz was ready, since he had been rather patient and vocal so far, so after Kouta pumped himself a few times and coated his cock in lube, he lined himself up with Noiz's entrance.]

The boundaries apply to you too.

[Even if Noiz couldn't feel pain like others, he was sure he could still feel pressure or discomfort. Kouta eased in slowly at first, instead focusing on kissing Noiz and sucking his tongue into his mouth to see if that seemed to have any effect on him.]

[ There's still some discomfort. Noiz remembers being in his room, and though it was as much of a cage as a home, he at least knew everything that happened in there. He didn't need to think about other people at all beyond transactions through a computer screen.

This is different. It already felt different, and as he kisses Kouta again, Noiz inhales quickly through his nose and tenses up as his tongue is sucked on. When he relaxes again, he lets Kouta's cock in deeper and fill him up. ]

Hahh. [ Noiz moans breathily and moves his tongue to press his piercing to the roof of Kouta's mouth, encouraging. He opens his legs and gets them around his waist as much as he can. ]

[The tongue piercing was definitely new, but Kouta didn't dislike it. The coolness of the metal seemed to warm up against the roof of his mouth, and eagerly he used the tip of his tongue to toy with it. He pulled on it gently, since it seemed that Noiz did indeed feel things when done to his tongue, and started to pick up his pace in fucking into him.

He dragged his mouth away from Noiz's briefly to scrape his teeth against Noiz's ear.]

I like these piercings of yours.

[ Kouta really listened to him. Noiz drags his nails over his shoulders, groaning louder when the kiss breaks. ]

You can bite the ones in my ear.

[ That will be sensitive enough to feel good too. Noiz tips his head back and braces one forearm above his head against the arm of the couch, breathing heavily as the sensations intensify the longer Kouta fucks him. He turns his face into his shoulder to lick the side of his neck, then makes his way up to his ear to feel the shape of it with his tongue. ]

[He didn't need to be told twice, biting and toying with the piercings in Noiz's ear, laughing slightly as Noiz seemed to get more into it. He shifted to let Noiz explore up his neck, reaching between them to grope along for the piercings he had felt in Noiz's cock.]

You don't have to be delicate with me.

[He wanted Noiz's teeth against him too, both to show Noiz that Kouta could take as good as he got, and because it would arouse him further.]

[ Every extra pinch and tug on his ear adds to the experience. Noiz can feel the arousal more and more, a kind of heat he feels only occasionally.

Kouta's skin tastes of sweat and something else. Kouta's own unique taste. Now that Noiz knows it, he can pick it out from the trees of the forest, or the city. Panting quietly, he claws again at his back and finally bites down hard as he bears down on the hard thrusts. The many points of his teeth feel the resistance, but more importantly, Noiz can taste his blood. ]

[Since Noiz seemed to respond well to Kouta toying with his piercings, he kept it up, trying to time the tugs to Noiz's earrings to his thrusts. But as soon as he felt Noiz's teeth break his skin, he lost his rhythm, groaning at the pain that tempered and added to the pleasure building up.

If this kept up, he was going to come first, so in an effort to get Noiz off, he shifted so that Noiz's hips were shifted upwards more, helping him thrust in deeper.]

C'mon Noiz-

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